Padd Solutions

I have to admit something to put this post in perspective.  I haven't bought a single CD or song in over 5 years.  Yes it's true.  I'm not going to admit to anything here, just keep that in mind.  It's not that I don't think most musicians deserve the money, I guess some of them do, its just that most music isn't that good or it's managed by corporate dildos like WMG who block half of Youtube in a misguided effort to keep me from hearing the sounds their artists make.  I oblige them and don't listen.  That's my story and Im sticking to it.

But then I accidentally stumbled upon Auto Tune The News.  Funny, funny, FUNNY.  At first it was funny cause they are making stupid politicians sound amazing.  But then the tunes themselves kinda grew on me.  I even tracked them down on AmieSt and bought one of their songs.




Yeah, it's addicting and there are 11 of them. You can plainly see the progression as they get better at the sound (The green screen needs work, I love you guys, but really...) going from ATTN #1 through ATTN #11 (shown above).  You kinda have to watch the whole series cause there are running jokes through them all like the badly treated gorilla suit and a fascination with charts.  I even bought the song called "Space People From the Future" because I found myself singing it when I was bored, at a stoplight or listening to my mother on the phone.  Just kidding, I love you Mom.  It's insidious.

If you want to learn more about these guys, cause really I think they deserve the backlink, check them out at The Gregory Brothers website.  And don't pirate their music cause if you're gonna stick it to someone, stick it to the man, not the victims of Space People from the Future.  That is just wrong.

The Koreans love to put female chars in ridiculous clothes. Sometimes, its okay. Plate armor is generally skimpy but still kinda badass looking. But I'm a sorcerer and for some reason they think I want to look like I'm on my way to a 6 year old's birthday party.

ZOMG frilly, pink, butterflies and bows...  ARGH!  That is NOT BADASS looking.  I come charging across the Abyss at someone and I look like the estrogen fairy, not the harbinger of death and destruction!  But I made the best of it.  This week NCSoft came out with a frivolous magazine subscription drive that included bubblegum pink wings and I bought them to complete my estrogen fairy ensemble.


Oh yeah....  Now they will fear me and run from my evil pinkness!!!  Nope...  no matter how you look at it, pink just doesnt seem very scary.  Silkroad was pretty good at giving you armors and such that were grownup looking and they tended to avoid pink.  I remember it fondly for at least that.

Sam Raimi To Direct World Of Warcraft Movie
Spider-Man director chosen to adapt the fantasy video game franchise...

Legendary film-maker Sam Raimi has been confirmed as the director of the hotly-anticipated World of Warcraft movie.

The project seemed to have been in limbo since Warner Bros. and Legendary Pictures teamed up with Blizzard Entertainment to develop the game into a big screen adventure.

Things have gotten serious now though with Raimi and Charles Roven, producer of The Dark Knight, both confirmed to be on board.

World of Warcraft, often referred to as WoW, is a massively multiplayer online role-playing game (MMORPG) by Blizzard Entertainment. It has more than 11.5 million monthly subscribers, and holds the Guinness World Record for the most popular MMORPG.

Raimi plans to tackle the project after Spider-Man 4 wraps. The superhero flick is set to begin shooting early next year.

source: MTV news

I have been playing MMOs for about 6 years. 99% of them have been free ones. All free games have a generous slice of human existence and what I mean by that is; you have your knights, your maidens and your shady serfs. I have had more than my fair share of shady serf contact of a negative nature so trust me, Ive learned to be a wary maiden.

I like to enjoy all aspects of a game and am lucky enough to be able to run my computer all night long so I generally stall at night. One morning, I wake up, get my coffee and sit down to do some writing as I look over my stall. Then I get a PM from Pinoyballa.

He says, ","

I answer, "?"

He doesn't reply so I watch a few minutes and go back to writing. The only contact I have ever had with him is of course when he offered me a ridiculous amount of Jeon for my M3 elite chest. I didn't wish to sell it at that time, we talked back and forth because apparently he really thought I was silly for not selling it. Im ok with being silly in the name of good defense.

So back to my story. A few minutes later I get a PM from a guy named Flip something, a name I never saw before and he asks me about the chest. I tell him Im in a stall and writing right now but I would be happy to show him the chest later. He chitchats a few minutes and then goes quiet. About 5 minutes later, battle is announced, I go to it and when it ends, he again PMs me. I am kinda annoyed but I say FINE, Ill show him.

I tell him it will be a minute cause I have some items in the trade window and while I am transferring items, he says a curious thing.

"How do you make money? I am so broke!"

I ignore that and get the Elite from my storage, put it in the trade window and offer the trade. It's auto denied. I try a couple times and then PM him and tell him to turn on his trade. He says it is on, he must be bugged. I tell him to relog then and he does but still the trade doesn't go through.

"Put it in a stall." He says, "No one has 999,999,999 Jeon"

Red flags and whistles of course go off. Not only do ppl have WAY more than 1 bil Jeon, those that do have already assured me they are willing give it to me for the item.

"The people who have offered me more than a bil gold for the chest have that much gold and I dont want to sell, so go to my xfire and look up the screen." I say.

I tell him goodbye and reset my stall.

The moral of the story? I dunno... Maybe it's that some people don't take "NO" for an answer or that if they haven't had good luck, they are willing to take someone else's. The best rule is: If you think you want something, never, ever let it be in a position where someone can take it no matter how unlikely it may be. I'm not accusing anyone of anything, I'm no Nancy Drew. You can draw your own conclusions.

I did a review a while back for a small game called Warrior Epic. It was a cute game but got kinda repetitious for me and wasn't really my cup o' tea but still a good game. A couple Avalon people continue to play it though, namely Argonaut and Corrupt.

Well, we gave them the Avalon guild and wished them luck and high tailed it over to TwelveSky 2 where Fly and I are currently playing. Argo made a char and I think he likes it but then today, Fly tells me the cutest story about Avalon in Warrior Epic.

They decide to have a contest where they are gonna wipe all the guilds' points and at the end of the time period, whatever guilds have the most points (received from players completing missions) wins 50 gold per member and the leader gets a teeshirt.

Needless to say, Avalon has the largest guild in the game because Argonaut, recognizing that they had no guild limit, just thought he would see how many he could cram in it. lol 1.4K members later, everyone is screaming that there isnt anyone left to join guilds that AREN'T Avalon. Even the Game Masters....

Here is the thread where everyone is once again screaming that age old cry of, "Fack Avalon!" because not only did Avalon win first place, but it won second place as well because of course, Argo had to make AvaIon as well. So I say GG Warrior Epic! You got Avalowned!

How could this possibly be on accident? Either way, its like the funniest mob EVER.

So her name is the "Disloyal Maiden" and this is how she appears when you first see her.


Then, as you whack at her a funny thing happens...


And it continues.....



And then...




Yeah. I know. The mob that strips for you as you fight her then flops on her back with her legs spread. It HAD to be on purpose and Im sure they are gonna remove it because she really is bare breasted, but I find it incredibly funny.

EDIT: Turns out, EVERY female mob in the game (and there are a lot, throughout all levels) has this rendering issue. Sometimes when they die, they will die as the wrong mob or have the wrong clothes on, so its definitely a rendering problem, but a funny one.

So I found this awsome little website today on accident. I was watching some video where an annoying kid is crying about not being homo. If you havent seen it yet, you will and get as sick of it as you were of Chris "Leave Brittany alone!" Crackhead. I watch the first vid, one where the kid is saying that gay marriage is bad and that he used to be gay. Ha ha. Then he makes another video because people called him "homo". More ha ha. (Actually, I really laughed) but then on a response video I found a video made at xtranormal. I never heard of it and I couldnt resist.



So that was my xtranormal vide debut. You can sign into your youtube and upload it there also. The functions were clunky and I got a lot of errors so it took some patience and perseverance to finish. It was worth it. I love Microsoft Sam's deadpan voice. I liked how you can add emotions and movement, camera angles and everything. If you make a video about silkroad post it here, cause I wanna see it.

This fortress war was scary.... for about ten minutes. Fly overslept and didnt show up, I had to drag out the call list and wake some people up cause I started out with two Avalon parties of 5 and one tank and only one person could repair the gate. Grim.... *nods*

So we say, "Screw it" cause the best defense seems to be a balls out offensive. At least that is what we did. Our little undermanned parties just ran out and decimated three guilds full of botters while the lower levels stayed inside the gates and snipred them. I think we only got totally wiped three times. After my initial "OMFG" it soon became quite evident that despite our farming wizards and tank shortage, we still haven't lost our edge. The rest of the union came out and together, we smashed them over and over. The bots got wiped, the rogue party destroyed their command posts and even Corrupt lightened up and started joking around after about 15 minutes.

Im still pretty pissed at Fly for not showing up. *plans evil payback*

So we are the Fortress winners yet again on Venus, both Avalon and Odyssey. The bots always give up half way through and the guy we were killing 10 minutes ago is now globaling, "Tomb Taxi Pls!! I pay good!" The bots tried to party for a while to get better at PVP but they gave up about 2 weeks after the cap raise. They think we win cause we are organized. (Some bot thinks it's because there were two lvl 6X wizards inside, shooting through the gate. LOL!!! zomg h4xxx!!) We arent. We win cause we dont bot.

Special thanks to the union guilds who signed up and showed up. I saw so many people out there doing what they were supposed to be doing and doing it well . You guys really do rock. The group that takes out the command posts reminds me of the pitchfork waving mob in those old black and white movies.

Thanks Prophet, this made my day.

Ill warn you right away. The real title for this article should be +5 and higher: An SRO Fairy Tale. There are a lot of theories and myths surrounding plussing in SilkRoad. Ill give you some of the more colorful ones, hey you never know, they might work for you. These are the top 20 plussing myths that came from talking to people who were successful at making +5 and over.

1. Leave the item in the bank for a day between plusses.
2. Zoom all the way into your char and look up at the sky.
3. Go someplace on the map with no lag and no players like the dark cave.
4. Do it naked (in game naked).
5. Only plus your item in direct sunlight or shade.
6. Cover the alchemy window with another window and dont watch it.
7. Wear an item that you were wearing when you plussed successfully before.
8. Use the item till its dura is low and then plus it.
9. Plussing an item with low stats and no blues is easiest.
10. If an item fails a lot, its a dud and wont ever plus for you.
11. Get a running start and plus while you are running.
12. Fail an item that you dont care about first.
13. Plus as fast as you can in a laggy place, like Hotan Storage
14. Transfer the item and the elixirs to a level one char and use it instead of the higher level.
15. Hold the item in the #1 inventory slot and the lucky powders on the 2nd page.
16. Take the item where you train and do it in between monsters you kill.
17. Plus your item while wearing your job suit.
18. Go to a "special place". (some are listed below, but there are many of them)
19. Go to a ferry and cross it after every fail to "reset" the item.
20. Close the alchemy window before the animation is finished.

Places that people think are lucky include:

• The railing at east Hotan behind the jewler
• The stairs at Jangan nearest the teleporter
• On the mountain at Chasers
• In the arena where Lord Yarkan spawns
• Stand inside the short, fat palm trees at S Gate Hotan.
• Under the water outside of Hotan
• At the back of the north building in Hotan, where the guild NPC is

My own guaranteed method of plussing an item is of course buying it plussed already from AlbelNox or paying Spanktastik to plus it after I buy it. I have a lovely +5 set of light armor and +7 rod and shield using this method, so I guarantee it will work.

that danjo song is everywhere. I have seen one made for almost every game imaginable. Yesterday, someone showed me one for silkroad online and it is brilliant. If anyone knows the actual origin of the song, Id love to know about it. I have seen the original video of it, but no one seems to know where the song came from.

English translation of the lyrics:

Teacher! Boys are not listening to the tour guide!
Teacher! Girls haven't come back from shopping yet!
Shut up! Fall in! Don't disrupt the teamwork.
Stand in a line as "boy, girl, boy, girl..." alternately.
Teacher! Boys outnumber girls a bit.
Alright, then line up as "boy girl boy boy girl boy girl."
"Boy girl boy girl boy boy girl", right?
No! Listen up! Stand like this.
"boy girl boy boy girl boy girl."


Captain! How should we arrange the seating order of girls?
Captain! Let's decide boys' seats first!
Wait a second! Don't decide on your own.
Assign seats like "boy, girl, boy, girl..." alternately.
Captain! One of the girl is late for the party.
Alright, then arrange like "boy girl boy boy girl boy girl."
"Boy girl boy girl boy boy girl", right?
No! Listen up! Have seats like this.
"boy girl boy boy girl boy girl.

I made this for my friend Fly, but I thought Id share it with everyone. I made it as detailed as I could, changing the radar, the skills, the names, the chat, everything I could think of. Hope you enjoy!

Passed on to me via email from a friend....

1. We want to control the entire game... and you.

You think we want control of such a rag-tag group of guys? I’d rather go bobbing for apples in a deep fryer. If I wanted to control you, I’d show up at the game with a chair and a whip. Sit and ponder that, friend.

2. We’re there because you’re there.

A girl gamer, a REAL girl gamer, is there because she wants to be. Let me ask you this: Do you think you’re charming enough to make a girl unwillingly spend an entire evening with a bunch of people who get that excited about 4 str 4 stam leather belt? I thought not.

3. We make an effort to date every gamer in the group.

You got us there. We actually keep lists of the gamers we haven’t dated yet, and we check them off as we go. I got extra Girl Gamer Points (GGPs) because I dated all the eligible guys in our group and then managed to cause a major schism, causing half the people to quit talking to the other half. I traded my GGPs in for some fingerless gloves and a new mouse and now I’m on the lookout for new victims… Get real.

4. We should be in charge of dinner and/or cleanup.

The next time you think about saddling the girl gamer with dinner preparations, consider her character first. If she’s playing a bitter extraterrestrial terrorist who hates everyone without provocation and dabbles in torture on the side because it’s fun, it’s probably not a good idea to ask. If her character is primarily engaged in kissing up and crocheting, go ahead. Ask.

5. We’re only interested in playing sex kittens or innocent ingénue-types.

Hello, Pot. I’m Kettle. You’re black.

Sure, girl gamers have schticks. So do you, Mr. Lone Wolf… and you, Mr. Combat Monster. And, while we’re at it, let me ask you a question… How many of your characters are girls? Most guys play girls in MMOs with the excuse, "They are nice to stare at while I play".

6. We are utterly incapable of understanding the rules.

Once, I heard a gamer comment, “Hey, man, she’s a girl. Girls don’t get the rules; it’s like a math thing or something.” Buddy, I’ll out-math you any time… and then I’ll tear you into tiny little pieces and eat you for breakfast. We are quite capable of understanding the rules, if you’d explain them in something that approximates English, or loosen your death-hold on the rulebook and just let us read them for ourselves.

7. We flutter our eyelashes at GMs to get our way.

I did that once. The GM very politely gave me what I wanted and, then, I realized I didn’t want it after all (because, as we all know, a good GM gives you what you want and then makes you regret having ever asked). The end result was that I had to extract my foot from my mouth. If you let girl gamers walk all over you as a player or a GM, more fool you. You need to get out and date more, friend.

8. We hate other girl gamers.

Well, sure! Why not? After all, other girl gamers might hog all the GGPs and then we’d be out some valuable prizes. We have to protect our territory, after all. Get real. If a true girl gamer can’t stand another girl in your group, it’s either a personal thing or maybe that girl is one of those fake-scheming-break-up-the-group types we’ve been discussing.

9. We don’t appreciate a good combat.

Correction: We do appreciate a good combat. What we don’t do is a) get sexually aroused over it or b) spend hours upon hours memorizing the caliber and number of shots for a revolver that was last used with regularity in the 1950s. We’ve got better things to do than memorize statistics. Like planning out how to spend out GGPs, for instance.

10. Because we are girls, you cannot hope to understand anything about us, including our gaming style.

Well… maybe there’s a bit of truth in that one, after all.

I love my boys, I really do. Ive been hanging out with them for so long I tink of them all like some kind of second family. I know as much about them as most people do in real life, Im sure. Ive also picked up various habits from them all. Most are good ones.
But some are NOT.
In vent we have all been using certain acronyms as words for a long time. "Berb" instead of B.R.B., "Lull" instead of L.O.L., etc. We have absurd ones that only happen in game like "Puht a guh", which is of course, P.T.G., or party giant. We use these a lot. Several times a day, ever day, 7 days a week. They have wriggled their way into my 3x real life conversational style and that is NOT ok.
Today I was speaking to my daughter's teacher and I accidentally used the word "LOL". I didnt mean to. I felt kinda silly. Grown people don't use the word "LOL". On the plus side, in K-mart buying bottled water, I used the acronym W.T.F. (what the fuck) and my teenage daughter asked me to stop using those words in public cause I am just too old. The checkout lady backed me up. Good customer service or not, I appreciated it. I have called people in RL noobs so many times that everyone I know outside of gaming knows what that means.
I have also developed a cutting sense of humor and a bit of a potty mouth hanging out with gamers as well. I don't think that has hurt me too much.
Ill have to make up a gamers' glossary of stupid shit to say in Vent. Examples like "OMG that's huge" followed by "That's what she said" followed by "Yeah but never to you". It's old, but still damn funny when it works.